i've gotten weirdly good at self-administering a lateral flow test
Kara Brightwell: skilled at scraping her own tonsils, and inserting things too far up her nostrils
imagine showing that my to myself eighteen months ago
she'd probably go "oh okay so, uh, 'Kara', i see, that's a thing we did, okay. wanna make out"
i had a desk assigned to me, and it was by a window, and it was in a building that isn't my flat, and i got to go there and not be in the same 46m² forever
i saw like. twenty people. in an office that has capacity for like fifteen hundred.
i had a burger, a real burger made out of cow, from a fast food restaurant, with cheesy fries
it was so normal!
this is genuinely the best thing i've been able to do for my mental health during the entire panettone
i'm going back like. twice a week now, fuck it
2. trying not to burn out
even though i quit therapy a while ago it turns out i have a tiny simulated version of my therapist in my head now that says things like "be kind to yourself" and "what makes you say that" and "you don't have to feel like this"
so last week when i wrote "holy shit i'm burning out" it turns out that wasn't a self deprecating joke, and i actually need to do something about it?
which i noticed immediately after writing that post, and requested access to the office, and a bunch of fridays off
doing normal things, which i have not done in some time, is helping reset my brain
also taking time off and not giving myself pressure to achieve things(? what), good for my energy turns out?
and i'm going camping in two weeks now and not having any internet and cooking fish on charcoal
3. i made a music
it's an accidental homage to Ambient 4: On Land by Brian Eno
serendipity and coincidence and taking ownership of your surroundings